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There are many storms rocking several homes today because of either distorted or myopic view of why marriage was established.
Many assume they know, but only to discover that their knowledge of the subject is either faulty or shallow.
Let's consider some wrong views of the reasons for marriage.
1. Marriage is established solely for reproduction. Surely that was part of the reasons why God established marriage, but when that becomes all you can think marriage is all about, you will miss out the pleasure and blessings attached to it.
Many put off with their wives because she couldn't have a child or have delayed having children. And many on the other hand could not see any worth in their wives than being a sex object, someone that should only be consulted when in need of a baby as if women are a baby factory.
It's only an ignorant man that will divorce his wife for inability to have a child.
Children, though, are the beauty of marriage, but when that becomes the only reason to love your wife in the marriage, then your understanding of the purpose of marriage is sickling.
2. Man is to be responsible for every need at home. Many women still hold such wrong mentality, and it is killing the bond of togetherness in their marriage.
There is never a law anywhere that says a woman must leave every responsibility of the home to the husband.
I do know a woman who can never put down money on her purse to cook in her husband’s absence because she considered it solely man's responsibility to cater for his family needs.
Her case was so worse that she can't boast of #1000 in the education of their children right from primary school till they graduated. This is not a formulation. It's a matter I know quite well of.
I don't see anything wrong filling the gap for your husband when it's within your reach to do so.
Woman, you're not in that home just to be a consumer, not to be a liability. You're rather there to be a help meet.
No virtuous woman will place all the problems of the home on her husband. She is rather involved in all that is required to make her family better day by day.
3. Money is the principal cause of happiness in the family. This is another big lie. Money is good and essential in marriage, but it's not a yardstick for a happy home neither is marriage established to be a money-making venture.
Your husband could be rich and yet be maltreating you. Your husband may lavish you with money and still not be affectionate.
Several young ladies out of ignorant keep on pursuing wealthy guys, thinking that will guarantee them a paradise when married.
Marriage is not established for the purpose of being wealthy. Yes God gives the power to make wealth, but when you enter a marital relationship on that basis, the day the man has financial challenges, you may want to consider backing out which is the case with many today.
4. A woman can't be richer than her husband. There are many schools of thoughts that if a woman is richer than her husband, she must have used the destiny of that husband. But people of this view could not establish where they found the rules governing riches in the family and which side it must turn to.
In an atmosphere of healthy understanding of why marriage is established, whatever any of the couple has both belong to them. Because when joining them together, they were not told they will only be one on the bed but in everything.
WHY THEN IS MARRIAGE ESTABLISHED?
Marriage was established by God for His own honor and glory. I know that will shock many, but I'll explain further.
Until you have a clear understanding of this truth that your marriage is established to display the glory and honor of God, nothing good can come out of such marriage.
Why will I love a difficult wife? I love her so that through my actions towards her, God is glorified. Why would I submit to an unloving husband? I do so that God could be honored in my home.
To be sincere, some husbands or wives are just too difficult to deal with, but the question you should always ask yourself is will God be glorified in beating my wife or cheating on my husband? Will God still be honored when I divorce my wife because she couldn't bear children? No.
But will God be honored when I submit to my husband as on to the Lord or when I, as the husband love my wife as myself and willing to give my all for her as Christ gave His all for the Church? I say yes!
The difference between every two marriages is the understanding or lack of their understanding of the purpose of marriage.
And the good news is when your marriage becomes Christ-exalting and God-glorifying, barrenness will be taken care of. The atmosphere of love and oneness will propel success, and you will live together to enjoy each other till death do you apart. And the most interesting one, you will raise godly, obedient, excellent and wonderful children.
This article is written by:
Kehinde Pius O
A missionary, blogger, life coach and anti-suicidal advocate
Read more impactful works of the writer on www.notosuicidalthoughts.com