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6 ways to win the heart of your in-laws

There is a general notion by most people especially ladies that their mother-in-laws or father-in-laws will be an enemy to them. This notion is unhealthy because in-laws are good people to love, cherish and respect. Although, they should not be in control of how your home should be run. However, you must not become defensive or cold towards them. But their suggestions can be debated on by you and your husband to know whether to act on it.

Moreover, you need to put yourself in their shoes before you can understand the reasons for some of their actions. Some of them haven’t gotten over the fact that their son or daughter is matured enough to be independent and most especially he or she is married. The bond that exists between parents and their children are strong and it will take some time for them to realize the transition that has taken place: son now a husband or daughter now a wife. Some of the father or mother-in-laws still see their sons or daughters as someone under their control. However, they need to wake up from such dreamland.

You will need to take some steps for you to see the better side of your in-laws; else, there will always be friction. And this may have a negative effect on your matrimonial home if your husband doesn’t apply wisdom.

Below are some of the steps to take to win your in-law's heart and see the better side of them:

1.   Don’t create unhealthy impression about them

Having the wrong impression about your in-laws will definitely affect your relationship with them. There is what is called the law of expectation: it states that what you expect is what you receive. This implies that if you see them as bad that is exactly what they will be to you. Your expectation should be that your in-laws will be good to you. If it now happens otherwise, you can win them by loving them. But never create a bad image of them.

2.   Live peaceably with them

Do not give room for any friction or misunderstanding. As much as lies in you, be at peace with them

3.   Be good to them

Be ready to render assistance to them if it is in your capacity to do so. Also, don’t poison your husband’s heart against his parents. Anytime he wants to fulfill his role as a son, please don’t go against it. You must support him to take care of his parents. Some of them are in their 60s and above, and this age requires that you show care and love towards them.

4.   Be accommodating

Be ready to receive them whenever they come on a visit. You should not make them feel they are in strange place and that they are not welcome. Make them feel at home for the little time they want to spend with you and your husband. Give them good food and don’t starve them.

5.   Respect and value them

There is a general saying that respect is reciprocal. If you respect them, they will respect you.

6.   Be open to their advice

Don’t make them feel their advice is outdated or worthless. Respect their views, be open to their advice but you and your husband must debate on it before you decide whether to take it.

There is no benefit in creating enmity between you and your in-laws. In fact, there are many things you are losing by being their enemy.